Craigslist Comedy Gold!

[Wotan]

So...
  I've recently been updating my various online résumés, including on Craigslist.  This morning I stumbled across the particular gem I've reprinted below for your reading enjoyment.  I actually think this guy's serious, and I bet he actually gets some responses.

  Reprinted ad is below:

THIS IS A REAL ADD FOR EMPLOYMENT WANTED!! PLEASE DO NOT FLAG.

Do you have whiny ungrateful employees that act as if you owe them more than they deserve? Do they have no respect for you? Don't fear I am here to help. After a week or two of me You will get the respect and productivity you deserve from those little A-Holes.
About me:
I often show up late, sometimes drunk. I take about three smoke breaks per hour. I always go to lunch at strip clubs usually returning late with the "waitress" if I return at all. I have absolutely no skills what so ever, I can type and use a computer but prefer to look at youtube and facebook all day. Any work assigned to me will be passed off on to others or thrown away. Sometimes I bring my guitar to work to play in the office.(electric because acoustic is for hippies!) I will not follow dress code unless I absolutely have to? I can be rude and obnoxious if required. I may also nap from time to time. I constantly ask others for help and then disappear for hours on end.

I require the maximum pay you can offer. I will not work NIGHTS or WEEKENDS and I will need two paid sick days per week, where I may show up and ask you out for drinks in the middle of the day or mid morning just to make others jealous!

This will be kept between myself and the employer I will not give any information to the staff about our arrangement.
You can put me on payroll or I can work independently your choice.

Your employees will be in awe as to why I was hired in the first place. The best part is you get to RUTHLESSLY FIRE me in front of everyone.(screaming profanity at me,waiving forms in my face, and for a small fee I will let you threaten to hit me!) While I am begging for my job to feed my 2 starving kids and my pregnant wife you say "GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE ,WHO'S NEXT!" then look around at the entire staff. This gets results fast! You will have the respect and productivity you deserve!! Don't worry there is a consent form we both sign, no lawsuits here.

THIS IS A REAL ADD FOR EMPLOYMENT!!!! PLEASE DO NOT FLAG.
serious inquires only! Please don't waste my time if you are not going to hire me.
I am ready to start A.S.A.P. I can start TODAY
E-MAIL ME TO SET UP AN APPOINTMENT

[alleycat009]

That's hilarious!

Kinda reminds me of "the good ol' days" at my current job, where there's a pub across the street... the one and only place close by that serves food.

The co-ordinator used to drink a pint or two for lunch, along with some of the employees, then go back to work.

[Drewdle]

That's an interesting way to be employed. Keeping in mind, however, that your employees may not be stupid enough to feel sorry for this guy when they watch his behaviour. I'm sure he's had responses though.